Monday, December 31, 2012

Prof Dr Raman Subramaniam; FMGC

Early 2011, we were introduced to Dr. Raman. His clinic (FMGC) is at Jaya One. We knew our search for a gynea was over when we met him. Yeap, right from the first visit. Both hubby and myself were very comfortable and satisfied. Or should I say, relieved even - that we found our doctor!

He took his time to run various investigations. He started from the very beginning to the very end. He never gave up even after 3 failed IUIs. It was after the laparoscopy that he told us, IVF is the only thing left to try now and he recommended an excellent reproductive specialist, Dr Eeson.

During my laparoscopy surgery, he got Dr Eeson to come in as well, since Dr Raman foresaw that we may have to go in for IVF. This is so that when we do actually go in for IVF, Dr Eeson would have already known my insides, so to speak. Now tell me, how many doctors you know that think ahead and be pro active? This was all done in goodwill. Dr Eeson was not paid to come in to the OT to have a look. From there you can know what kind of character Dr Eeson has as well.

Dr Raman is very fatherly. Oh no, I don't mean the fatherly kind who would be nosy, over caring etc... He was caring, never nosy, always ready to listen to what we have to say, took his time to answer any questions we had, always made sure we were comfortable. Even at times when we wanted to discuss something private, he never hesitated to ask his nurse to leave the room. 

Despite being extremely experienced, he never once generalized me. I definitely needed a doctor who would understand that I am just different from the other women out there. My body, my health and my hormones especially can't be put in the same boat with others. 

I will never forget the day of my laparoscopy, he held my hand in the OT while I was about to be knocked out.

The only drawback is that the appointment to see him is first come first serve basis. You still have to come in the morning to register, but be prepared to wait 2 to 3 hours to see him. After a few visits, we got the hang of it. We went in the morning to register, and we would either come home (since our home isn't that far), or go have breakfast and waste some time and then go back up. Consultation charges are between RM90-RM100.

The nurses are nice too. There are two senior nurses, Ms Sona, and Ms Josephine. They are really very helpful. Sona is a person who is super positive all the time. She's always smiling too despite being so busy. Josephine is a person who is outspoken, but is very helpful. Be nice to them because they go through a lot in a day at the centre. 
Disclaimer: All comments & thoughts stated above regarding the doctor & the centre are solely of my own. Hence, judge the doctor for yourself before blindly deciding. What you look for in a doctor is not the same with me. Make an appointment to see a doctor, go for it, have a chat, and then decide.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Dr. T. P. Baskaran; HKL

Now, if you know or heard about Dr. Baskaran, you must be wondering why on earth I went to see him @_@  Well, simple - my parents knew him. They said he was a very good OBGYN at HKL. Hubby of course didn't follow me for any of the appointment because he wasn't happy with me going to HKL.

Anyway, first of all, he isn't an OBGYN. He is a specialist for maternal-fetal condition. Clearly, my folks aren't aware of the many clinical focus that is available. Or perhaps it wasn't all complicated during their time eh? 

He did some blood tests and scans for me, and asked for hubby to take a SA as well (which of course he didn't do it there) - after a couple of times of seeing him, he just said to me that we have to do IVF. Without even checking on my tubes etc. Yes, I admit, we are doing IVF now. He referred me to a reproductive specialist in HKL itself, which of course I didn't go. Hubby was never going to agree for us to go to HKL anyway. 

What can I say about our general hospital? Bad. If you are prepared to wait for half a day, or maybe more, then go ahead. Of course, all you gotta pay is a mere RM5 or RM10 - with a referral letter from a government clinic - but the service, the wait, the environment - not worth it. Oh, not to forget, all the trainees who will be there watching your scan etc. 

Oh, the doctor also has a clinic of his own somewhere in Sg Buloh and he also has clinic days at SDMC.

Disclaimer: All comments & thoughts stated above regarding the doctor & the hospital are solely of my own. Hence, judge the doctor for yourself before blindly deciding. What you look for in a doctor is not the same with me. Make an appointment to see a doctor, go for it, have a chat, and then decide.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Egg pick-up / Ovum Pick Up / Oocyte pick-up (OPU)

We reached KL Fertility Centre at 6.50am today. The nurse took my weight and height and showed us to our room. Honestly, we had no idea what to expect or what to do. When we walked in to our room, we just looked at each other. The room was like a hotel room. Well, what were we thinking - RM10,000 just for the OPU and embryo transfer; of course the environment would be the same standard. 

About 5 minutes later, I was asked to change into the surgery gown, and then I had to fill up some forms. Since I am not a patient here, so yeah, there was quite a bit of info to fill up and of course the many consent forms to be signed.

At approximately 7.30am, our doctor came to say hello. Again another consent form to be signed ;)  Anyway, he was happy to see us calm and collected. I was actually sitting in my gown next to hubby on the sofa, chatting and watching TV. 
A little while later, the anesthetist walked in. Very friendly. She explained that I will not be under full GA. Instead I would be under very heavy sedation. This is because it's an OPU, and the embryo transfer will be in 3 days, so they would not recommend me to take any heavy drugs. I did get a bit worried then and immediately asked her, would I feel anything. She confidently told me no, but I may be able to hear those in the OT talking. I suddenly had recalled my HSG Xray experience and didn't want that to repeat again. 

I was taken to the OT at 8.05am and was back in the room by 8.45am. Of course I didn't know anything until about 9.10am - the pain woke me up. The pain was really very bad and hubby told me later that I  had a tear roll down my eye. Since my threshold for pain is high, hubby knows when I say it's painful, it is really painful. I was immediately given a pain injection on my buttocks. 

I drifted off to sleep off and on. And during this time, someone informed hubby that it's time for him to produce his soldiers. By 10.30am, we were done with everything. I had a fruit and a few bites of cornflakes that was given to me, and a glass of orange juice. We then went upstairs to get the payment done. I was still in a daze all along. 

Then we waited for the doctor to meet us. He was delayed quite a bit. We only saw him around 1.20pm. Anyway, the surprising discovery is that my left ovary which was lagging, had 5 eggs sucked out. And the right that was responding so well, only had 2. Hahah The doctor kept trying to get more since the right had really good eggs previously, but none other than that 2. Hence, the reason why I had more pain than I should have. Yes, in total, we have 7 eggs. We know nothing about it for now, but we can only keep our fingers crossed and hope for the best. May there be at least 5 to 6 embryos as well. 

Now my meds are:
1. Zinnat antibiotics - twice daily for 5 days
4. Daily supplements - most importantly Folic Acid

1 tab twice daily at 12 hourly, taken orally
2 tab three daily at 8 hourly, taken vaginally

Friday, December 28, 2012

Dr. Fatima Najla; Kelana Jaya Medical Centre

In 2010, we decided to see a doctor to ask on how do I stop my OCP. Whether I would need to slowly ween off it or take any supplement to reduce any side effects I may have. Since we didn't want to return to Dr. Siva, I searched / asked around for a lady doctor. We thought let's try a lady doctor : Dr. Fatima Najla.

The hospital itself is okay. In comparison to Damansara Specialist Centre, the difference was almost nothing. Now you must have thought I'd say DSC was much better eh? The waiting time is no difference - can get quite long despite having an appointment made. She has evening clinics as well, which is a plus point. Consultation is between RM50 - RM70

The doctor is very nice. She doesn't rush you and she takes the time to explain things to you. We went to her a couple of times, but didn't continue again since she or the hospital do not do infertility investigations. We'd rather see a doctor at a hospital with the whole works. And yes, she gave me a prescription of Clomid without doing any sort of investigation. Perhaps it was common for some doctors to give patients who are already 30 to go on Clomid and say, okay, now you guys try this cycle with it.

Disclaimer: All comments & thoughts stated above regarding the doctor & the hospital are solely of my own. Hence, judge the doctor for yourself before blindly deciding. What you look for in a doctor is not the same with me. Make an appointment to see a doctor, go for it, have a chat, and then decide.

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Dato' Dr. Sivamohan; Damansara Specialist Centre

I've decided to blog about the hospitals we've been to, and our experience with the doctors we've met. Let me start with the first doctor we've ever seen in 2005 - Dato' Dr. Sivamohan who is a consultant OBGYN at Damansara Specialist Centre. 

He was the doctor who put me on Mercilon, the OCP. We went to him a few times, but then we didn't follow up thereafter. For some reason, I was not so comfortable with him. Yes, he may be very experience, but I was not too sure if he would take us seriously. Sometimes a doctor who is too experienced would think that they know your health very well just by talking to you and asking a couple of general questions. 

We didn't go to him for any main issues. We definitely were not planning to get pregnant then, hence the OCP. But now that I look back, I suppose I would have thought twice about going on OCP for almost 6 years if the doctor would have taken the initiative to explain and give us some knowledge on it. 

I have heard a lot of great things about this doctor. No doubt, he is very experienced, but he just couldn't be our doctor. 

As for the hospital, nothing much to say since he has a clinic / waiting area of his own. Yes, the wait at times can be long, but isn't that a norm anywhere? As for charges, consultation only is anything between RM90 - RM120.

Disclaimer: All comments & thoughts stated above regarding the doctor & the hospital are solely of my own. Hence, judge the doctor for yourself before blindly deciding. What you look for in a doctor is not the same with me. Make an appointment to see a doctor, go for it, have a chat, and then decide.

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

IVF - Lost count of the appts

Today was our last appointment before the egg retrieval a.k.a OPU (Ovum Pick Up). My estrogen levels are reaching 5000 plus. But my progesterone is ok - nothing alarming. Ah, you know the reason for testing the progesterone levels? To check if your uterine lining is doing good or not - not getting too matured. 

Anyway, I was given a higher dose of FSH today - a total of 450iu. Eggs on my left ovary are beginning to wake up, but not good enough. Can't delay the OPU either because the doctor can't put you on FSH for too long. Plus my right ovary is doing good and the time is right. 

OPU will be this Saturday at KL Fertility Centre. I will be admitted from 7am & discharged about 1pm, if all is ok. I will be on GA (thank God for that!). Hubby has been to the centre a few times now for sperm count and also for the sperm collection for our IUIs. I have yet to see the place myself.

Anyway, after the OPU, hubby will have to produce his soldiers on the spot when asked  :) 

The embryo transfer will be on New Year's day - yeap yeap, 1st January 2013  :) 
What a way to start our New Year eh? Well, a year we will move on - either with or without a baby. 

We would have to purchase some antibiotics and other meds as well. Tomorrow will be my last day for the Suprefact injection and at night (8pm precisely), I will have to take the trigger shot i.e. Ovidrel (hCG). Friday will be free of injections, but the start of the antibiotics at night. 

It will be exactly 22 days of daily injections tomorrow. And it doesn't end here. There will be more meds (tablets) - to be taken orally, and vaginally.  Yes, you read that right - vaginally. 

Good luck to us!

Tuesday, December 25, 2012


Both hubby and I are on supplements. Most of it were already a part of our daily supplements - well, I must admit that it's definitely not a daily thing. But ever since we started IVF, I've made sure that we take our supplements as recommended by the doctor daily. No skipping. 

Hubby's supplements - yeap, I am not the only one taking Folic Acid.


Monday, December 24, 2012

IVF - 9th Appointment: FSH increased more: 375iu

22nd Dec - Yes, the very next day. The eggs on my right ovaries are doing good. They have passed the required size i.e. 10mm in average. The eggs on my left are still slow. Only 1 has reached the required size. The other 3 are still lagging. So the doctor has increased my total FSH for today & tomorrow. 24th Dec we will be going in to check the progress and also my blood work results that was done today. 

After :)

Sunday, December 23, 2012

IVF - 8th Appointment: Increase of FSH: 300iu

21st Dec again a trip to the hospital. Well, it's a norm now. The doctor did mention that once we start the second phase, we will have to go in alternate days. Since the follicles in my left ovary is still lagging behind, the doctor has decided to increase my dosages. So today was 3 boxes of Foliculin and 1 box of HuMog. Oh, I forgot to mention, that Suprefact has to be continued daily. Suprefact is the one that ensures the doctor has full control over my hormones. 

I was a bit upset that my ovaries were not responding well. But the doctor kept saying it's okay, because all we need is one good egg. But it's a number game. The more the eggs, the chances of more embryos. Of course I was hoping for the minimum - 10.

I was depressed the whole day. But thank God I came out of it by night when hubby got home from work. 

Saturday, December 22, 2012

IVF - 7th Appointment: HuMog + Foliculin

19th Dec was our follow up - to check on the progress of my follicles. Right ovaries had 5 follicles but my left, only 4. Anyway, the doctor added HuMog now to my injections. So now, it's 2 boxes of Foliculin and 1 box of HuMog. The total of FSH is still 225 iu. 

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

IVF - 6th Appointment: Second phase

Day 2 period i.e. 13th Dec I gave blood & 14th Dec was our appointment. My blood work and TVS was all good and we are game for the second phase. The cyst that was seen in the last appointment, wasn't a cyst after all. The second phase is the complicated phase as the injections are not as straight forward. I am on Foliculin 225i.u and the continuation of Suprefact but only once a day. So now I take both the injections at the same time in the morning. The doctor explained that in the long protocol, the meds are mixed on our own based on my body's reaction. I will soon be adding another med into the injection. Tomorrow is our appointment to see if my ovaries are responding well - not too well either. It has to be balanced. 

The Foluculin injection is more than just an ant bite. This, I feel the pain. During and after injecting. The pain subsides after about 15 to 20 minutes. I was bleeding fresh blood the day before and also yesterday. As worried as I was in getting OHSS, but what hubby said came out true - it must have been just the stress, plus my period must have been not over entirely.

The daily dose for now
What do I feel? At times agitated, hot flush, my right pelvic area aches - nagging sort of ache, headaches.

Lets see what tomorrow's appointment unfolds.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

IVF - 5th Appointment: The start of the injections

Day 21 was on December 6th. I was very prepared for the injections but not for the side effects. Menopausal side effects can be scary. And with my history of PMDD, I was all the more freaked out. Funny isn't it? Most are scared of the injections....

I don't know if I've mentioned before - I am being put on the long protocol. This has been the way for IVF since ages ago, and is a better way to control my hormones compared to a short protocol. Based on my history, the doctor preferred that I go on the long protocol. 

Anyway, we went in for our appointment at Pantai. The doctor first of all did a TVS scan - to check on any possibility of cyst, or unusual happening with my insides. Lo and behold, I was shocked when he said I had a 4cm cyst. But then he also just as immediately added that it is most likely a corpus luteum since it was my Day 21 of my cycle.

Then we were sent to do the payment and to collect our meds for the whole cycle. It took us almost an hour to get our meds cuz the pharmacy had some issues regarding authorization to give out IVF meds. Finally our doctor spoke to the CEO and got the meds released for us on the package price. I will share the total package breakdown once all this is done. 

We had brought along our own cooler box, but to our surprise, it wasn't big enough! So the pharmacy gave us a polystyrene cooler box with all the meds in it. 

We then went back to the doctor's clinic and we were taught on how to do the injections. It has to be done twice a day and precisely at the same time - starting from the 2nd injection. Since we did it at 7.10pm, we had to do it everyday at 7.10am & 7.10pm. Yes, we have to plan our days wisely as I can never miss the timing to the injections. Yes, never. For the first 2 weeks - it will be only 1 med - Suprefact - 0.1ml twice a day.

In total it would be 28 injections - exactly 2 weeks. Hubby has given me once so far, and I've been doing on my own. It isn't a big deal. Just a pin prick. Yes, seriously. Probably my threshold for pain is different than others.

All the meds kept in the fridge the moment we got home. It took up the first shelf entirely!

The syringes
Excuse the photo. I can't seem to upload it the right way despite rotating it.
Anyway, this is the prep daily - Suprefact to be taken out 5 min before, 1 syringe & 2 alcohol swabs - 1 for the bottle, and another for the tummy.
The needle
The injection is done 2 fingers side of the navel, and 2 fingers below. The reason for this is because there are no major veins here. This is not an IV injection.

Next appointment is on Day 2 of my period. Yes, I will bleed as per normal. 

So far the side effects I have felt:
Day 1 & 2 - floaty feeling. It's like I am high on alcohol. 
Day 3 - was a bit edgy.

Hope it doesn't get any worse.

Friday, November 30, 2012

IVF - 4th Appointment: Mock Transfer

Day 9 - Mock Transfer. This time we waited more than an hour to see the doctor. Our appointment was at 10.30am, and our turn only came at 12.10pm. 

The doctor mentioned that the mock transfer would be exactly as how an IUI is done. So I told the doctor that based on my 3 IUI experience, the doctor then had to clip my cervix in order to get through to my uterus. And also, I have a retroveted uterus. The clippig of the cervix is the most painful for me. The doctor said, let's take a look first, and then we take it from there.

It was a piece of cake! No clipping of cervix was needed. He just used a plastic speculum and a cathetar - and in hardly a minute, I was seeing the cathethar in my uterus on the screen. This doctor is simply awesome. The whole procedure was just like a red ant bite! Ahhh so relieved! No wonder for some, IUI is not a big deal! Now I get it. It was just unfortunate that during my IUIs it wasn't so smooth. Well, nothing seemed to be smooth for me anyway!

The doctor said he didn't foresee any problems during the real embryo transfer.

I felt like giving the doctor a hug for making it so pain free! An ant bite doesn't count as pain!

Next up - Day 21: The beginning of the injections.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

IVF - 3rd Appoitment: TVS Scan

This month my period came unexpectedly early. I was 4 to 5 days early. Sigh. Looking back, I realize, I did have symptoms - I wanted to just munch and munch non stop. Ahh no wonder. 

It came on Friday - 16th, afternoon, in office. I managed to continue work until about 5.30pm, then I knew, if I continue to stay on, I won't be able to drive back home. True enough, I reached home, had my shower, and was on the bed - curled in pain. I didn't dare take any pain killers as this cycle we are starting IVF - so just had to bare with the pain. I didn't even know when hubby got home. All I knew is, he was next to me, asking me what do I want to have for dinner. I had no appetite. I just felt like cutting open my insides and taking everything out. Yes, that's how bad my dysmenorrhea is. 

Anyway, since Day 2 I was suppose to see the doctor for my TVS scan - I had sent my doc a text and he replied to go in at 10am the next day to see him at Pantai. The scan was not as disgusting as I thought it would be. Thank God my flow at that point of time wasn't just gushing out. I went to the washroom, got myself cleaned up and then got on to the examination bed. He inserted the scan stick, and moved it around. All I felt was really bad pressure. But after the scan, my dysmenorrhea was worse.

During this visit, the doctor also gave us consent forms for me to sign. He went through again and again to ensure we are very much equipped with all the information no matter how tiny it may be. He kept asking us if we have any questions at all. 

Next up - Day 9 - Mock transfer. 

Monday, November 26, 2012

Super busy

I have not had time to update my blog, check my emails, or even just switch on my laptop to browse around. The reason is just one: Busy. Yes, I am really that busy. My office is shifting, and being in the Office Services department, and literally the only staff - apart from my boss, who is already so busy as she's the MD's secreatary as well, the despatch who we can't rely on even the simplest things, and the receptionist, who is always willing to help, but she's due to deliver anytime, so I took up the responsibility. Not because I was being told, but because I have ownership. 

I work from 7 something in the morning, until 7ish / 8 at night. By the time I come home, I am soo mentally exhausted that all I feel like doing is shower and sleep. But even sleep has become an issue. I am too tired to fall asleep! I have been going to office even on weekends. I have not had time to pack my own things, as I for one, have to pack items from the Stationery Store, the Staff Shop, the General Storage items, the Mail Room and then my own stuff. I have even gotten hubby dearest to help me with the packing, which he said no problem! Awww

All through my years working here, I have never really worked so close with the head of the dpt, who is also the HR manager. But this time, it's to the extend that I update him from time to time via WhatsApp. 

I am hoping that before I start my IVF injections, everything would have been settled and start to be calm a little bit. Next week - is the actual move. Everyone is already going to be at the new office - officially start work from there. But I would have to oversee the moving of everyone's boxes. 5 days - 3 floors. The week after, all the cabinets. 

I so need a good massage and I can't wait to clear my 6 days leave before the end of my contract!

I am taking this time that I have now before hubs wake up and our day begins at the office again to update whatever I can. I will be writing on my 3rd & 4th IVF appointments and it will be set to publish on different dates.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Chefel Flip 'N' Cook Pan

Yes. I did buy it! We got this on the 28th October. Two word review: Just great!

I have been cooking using this since I got hold of it. Hubby can even say "aren't you going to give it a break?" Hahah It serves as a non stick pan, frying pan, grill pan & pressurized pan. 

Cooking is cut by half the time because of the pressurized ability. Imagine a pressure cooker's concept made into a pan. And yes, it is true, you can flip and cook on both sides. And yes, no splatters & hardly any effort needed to clean it. 

I am in love with this pan! 

Oh and for those of you out there who don't have a microwave (yes, we don't have a microwave at home), this pan does the trick. I wanted to test if I could thaw chicken fillets right from the freezer, and yes, in less than 5 minutes, the chicken was already thawed! 

If you are using sauces to cook, please expect some of the extra liquid that comes out from the built in oil/liquid trap. But it's no big deal as all you need to do is wipe your stove with a damp cloth. Yeap. That's it. 

Most times I cook dinner once I get home from work. And I will store them in pyrex / bowls and keep them in the oven so that it still remains hot when hubby has his dinner. And then there's all those dishes to wash. But now, I make everything, and yes, I still dish it out, but once I am done, I just dish everything back into the pan in sections. When hubs is back and ready to have his dinner, I just heat it up for like a minute or so, and done. Takes me 2 minutes to clean up. So I don't have to be spending time to clean up again. 

There is a 1 year warranty for this product by Cosway. Price is RM159 + 4 Redemption Points.

Friday, November 2, 2012

IVF - 2nd Appointment

Yesterday we went for our 2nd appointment. Some blood work was done on my Day 2 last week, so this is the follow-up appointment. Our blood work results are all good to go for IVF. Yes, in approximately two to three weeks, we embark on this journey. 

Here are a few things the doctor shared with us. First of all, we have to follow the dates he has written down for us. No excuses are accepted. In a nutshell, here's the schedule for now:

Day 2 next period, to see him for a scan. Yes, as disgusting as it may sound, he will do a transvaginal scan to do a Antral Follicle Count. On Day 9 or 10, he will do a mock transfer. And on Day 21, I start my injections. The first injection will be twice a day for two weeks. Then I will have to go in for a scan, and he will put me on another injection - to trigger my ovaries to produce extra eggs. Once I start my second phase of injections, I would have to go in every other day for a scan. The whole process takes about 4 weeks.  

And on the cost, there may be an increase of RM1,500. We are totally prepared for IVF, especially me. And I do not want to further postpone this. Hence, due to some delays of the renovation in Pantai Hospital, he may do the embryo retrieval and transfer and use the embryo lab at KL Fertility Centre in Damansara Heights. Yes, as some of you might know - the clinic of Dr Prashant. My doctor and Dr Prashant work very closely together. 

I think from the look of my face, the doctor knew I was concerned what if there are anymore price increase. So I decided to be honest and tell him that we are taking a loan for this. He smiled and said, from your parents only right? I looked at him straight face, no, our parents don't even know we are doing IVF. Then he became serious and told us that he would definitely cap the price and would not over exceed more than what we have discussed. Pheww

Oh, and we have to get a cooler box. All the medications are heat sensitive.

He again stressed out about this being an emotional, mental and even financial roller coaster. 

I was going to ask him about emergency contact numbers once we start the injections. I understand from Arena that Sunfert provides a hotline number. Before I could ask, the doctor gave his card and wrote his mobile number on it. So I jokingly asked him, so if there's an emergency of some sort, we can call you directly. He smiled and said yes, of course. Okay, that's a relieve!

Whatever it is, we are looking forward to it. I even told the doctor that I for one need to do this. Get it over and done with it. If it's positive, awesome, if it isn't, then I want to move on. And hubby agreed too.

It just got me thinking as I write this - if it's positive, it will be the best Birthday gift to have!! 

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Karva Chauth - Mehndi / Henna

Yes, I am fasting tomorrow (2nd Nov). No, it's not a religion thing. No, it's not my first time, but yes, it's my first time doing it almost the right way - not with the pooja stuff etc. Anyway, why I have decided to do it this year this way, is because I feel that the bond my husband and I share is very much stronger. We are more in tune with each other. Perhaps the TTC journey has made us this way. I wouldn't want it any other way. 

Karva Chauth (Hindi: करवा चौथ, Punjabi: ਕਰਵਾ ਚੌਥ) is an annual one-day festival celebrated by Hindu and some Sikh women in North India, the Indian state of Gujarat and parts of Pakistan in which married women fast from sunrise to moonrise for the safety and longevity of their husbands. - Wikepedia

First off, the mehndi / henna. I contacted a few henna artists on FB but some of them never even bothered to reply me. And then I forgot about it until 25th Oct when I decided to email Nakreze Mehndi. I got a reply the very next day and she was keen to do it for me. In the midst of having so many things going on in office and at home, I thought that 2nd November was still another week ahead. Next thing I realized, it was this week! Nevertheless, Leena of Nakreze was so very accommodating. Mind you, I had even told her that I only wanted a design between RM10-20, and yet, she didn't hesitate, what more turn me down, to come personally to my home and do it for me. Yes, just for me, one person. Now where can you get such a service? For a mere RM10-20 design per side, almost every henna artist would say no or would tell you to go by their place instead.

It was raining yesterday night. I was worried for her, not because I might not be able to get the henna done, but for her safety. Yes, I am a nice person okay? :) But she was so calm and cool, and told me not to worry and that she will be at my place by 9.30pm. By the way, she even thinks ahead for you that you would have to have dinner etc, so once you are done with everything, she will come by to do the henna. 

The moment we met, I liked her instantly. She is very humble, down to earth, no arrogance, friendly and a very lovely, sweet young lady! I honestly hope that she will continue to remain this way even when she starts having big businesses coming her way. People like me will continue to sing songs of her. And no, this is not a paid review! 

Oh, the henna that she uses, doesn't even need any lime juice to be dabbed on. Just wait for an hour till it dries completely, scrub it off and don't wash your hands - even with just water for 12 hours. Since I had to come in to office super early today, I didn't have the 12 hours, but yet, the henna has darken.

So fancy some henna for an occasion, dinner, or just for the fun of it? Contact Leena - trust me, you won't regret it! 

Here's what it look like once I scraped it off:
In the morning when I woke up today:


No, my hands didn't turn from orange, to brown to white in one day! Blame it solely on the lighting and my lack of skills in photography! Haha

Friday, October 26, 2012

The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards

Secrets. We all have secrets - but it is to what degree our secrets are - that's the question. This is a story about a husband who kept it a secret from his wife, that only one of their twin survived during childbirth. Only their son Paul. Their daughter, Phoebe, had died. In actual fact, no, she didn't. Phoebe was very much alive but had Down Syndrome. He thought he was doing his wife and himself a favor. He has a sister who died at a very young age - had Down Syndrome too.

But this secret made their relationship grow apart. His wife could never figure him out. What's on his mind. They hardly communicated. His son was just there, growing up.

One day, he died. And one year later, the nurse who was told to take their newborn daughter to an insitituition for Down Syndrome - did not have the heart to leave Phoebe there. She took care of Phoebe. Fought for her many fights - just to ensure she gets an education and healthcare. She came knocking on the wife's door - telling her the truth. That the daughter whom she thought she lost giving birth, is alive. Happy and alive. 

It ends by them all keeping in touch. Visiting each other. But to Phoebe, Caroline Gill (the nurse) is her mother.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Forbidden Love by Karen Robards

He was her guardian. She was his ward.  It all started with Megan tried to get the attention of her absentee guardian, Justin. Well, attention is what she got. She lost her virginity to him. She was 17, he was in his late 30s. Along the way, there was love, there was hate. He was married. She didn't know. As much as they despise each other, they love each other too. 

Then comes the pregnancy. How she adamantly said she wants to marry Donald. And that she loved him. Which was a total lie. Just to protect her child. How he left her at an estate far away, with just letters to take her through. When she was about to give birth, he proposed. They got married, but lost their baby. He was to choose - his wife or his child. He chose his wife.

It has a happy ending. They live happily and were blessed with a daughter.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

IVF - 1st step

Hopes crushed. Feel like a failure of not being able to conceive. This time I feel bad not for myself, but for my husband. He had hope. And I know how it feels when one has hope. And when that hope crushes, I know that feeling too.

Today we took the first step of the long staircase to IVF. Blood was drawn from us both for the various testing. Next Thursday is our appointment - discussing on the blood work results, and probably other nitty-gritty details.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

To buy or not to buy.... To buy

I have been wanting to get a good pan. I tried a stainless steel pan and it didn't serve me right. You see, I cook with hardly any oil, so I guess as much as I try not to use to non stick, I got to get back to it. I used to use the non stick from IKEA. Yes, the cheapo ones - I think about RM8 for one small pan. I had like 3 of it. But eventually, the coating had some scratches and knowing how I am, immediately I threw it out. Oh please, don't ever believe your MIL if they say "the pan can still be used". Don't. 

I came across the highly advertised 'flip & cook' pans, or also known as the 'happy call' pans. I did some search on the web and most had good stuff to say about it. Yes, they've tried and tested. I may just take the plunge and purchase it. It's available in Cosway too. I hope it really does the job for me cuz it's not so cheap. RM159 for members with 4 RPs. 

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

A dream

I had a dream on Monday night
A dream that I wish would come true
A dream where I delivered a beautiful baby boy
A dream where the akhar taken from our holy book was "r"
A dream where we called him Rupraaj
A name where in reality playfully came up with if it was a boy
A dream where we were crying tears of joy
A dream where we finally became parents
A dream where our bond grew stronger instantly
A dream where we were no longer two, but three.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

I wish

I read an "I wish" list of a TTCian. It was in Malay and I translated it here to English. Somewhere deep down in us who are trying, yes, we do feel that if only we could easily conceive. If only we could then we would feel complete being a woman. No no, don't worry, I am not getting all emotional etc. It's just a post that I read and want to share it out here. 

I wish to see him happy with the news
I wish to see him wait so anxiously for the arrival of our little miracle
I wish to see him whisper a prayer into the ears of our little miracle when he/she is born
I wish to see him carry our little miracle
I wish to see him sleep next to our little miracle
I wish to see him hug & kiss our little miracle
I wish to see them giggle and laugh together
I wish to see our little miracle
I wish to see the happiness in him when he becomes a father
I wish to also hear him say 'Thank you love, for you gave birth to our little miracle that we have been longing for'.

Thank you iwannabeumie for sharing!

Monday, October 15, 2012

Modem gone Kaput

Our home modem has gone kaput. Yeap, since Friday that is. So it kinda suck not having WiFi at home. See, I don't use data on my phone, it's always the WiFi at home. So not having WiFi is kinda odd. But it's not like I can't live without it.

It got me thinking how some people especially the younger generation depend on the internet so much. They don't go out and seek entertainment, instead their entertainment is solely relying on the internet. A colleague's daughter, who opted not to continue school any longer, sits in front of her computer from the time she wakes up, until the time she sleeps at wee hours in the morning. That's all her life is. Everyday. Yes, every single day.

Then the company my husband works for partly deals with students from various colleges and universities. Oh my God, when I hear the kind of complains these students have - and all related to the internet - makes me wonder, don't they have a life outside this world wide web? All they want is to play their online games, download movies, etc.

What is becoming to children of this era? I remember during my childhood days, my brother and I used to play badminton outside our house in Johor Bahru. We used to have stuff to do outside. To occupy ourselves. When I learnt how to ride a bicycle, thanks to my grandfather, I used to go and practice daily. Yes, I fell down, I cried, and did it all over again. When cousins got together, there was a lot of teasing, playing pranks on each other - especially on me, because I was the only girl - but it was fun. Now? Now children find that the internet is a way of life.

Yes, technology evolves. Yes, we all evolve. Using technology for the right purpose, (and yes for some entertainment too which includes social networking) is the right way. But to be depending on the internet to make your day is rubbish.
All images in this post courtesy of Google Images

Friday, October 12, 2012

IVF - 1st Appointment

Firstly, my first injection for IVF starts on day 22 of my next month's cycle. The reason: Pantai Hsp is having renovations going on - next to the IVF lab, our doctor is not in favor to have embryos be affected in any way because of the paint fumes. He wants to ensure that nothing affects the quality of the embryos. He has put on hold any IVF treatments for patients until the renovation is over and done with.

That's the first injection part. Before that, we have to do blood tests etc (both of us). There will be a few more visits to the doctor. They will also do a mock transfer to ensure the doctor is familiar with 'my passage'  and gets it right when he does the real embryo transfer. Didn't know all this happens as well. But it gives us confidence to know that our doctor is "particular".

The doctor's own words: "It is a very high roller coaster that you both would have ever taken. Emotionally, mentally & physically". Also, he wants us to have OCD in us - because he wants us to be really kiasu about this IVF. The jabs has to be taken precisely at the same time every day. I will be doing long protocol - so the first part of the injections will last 14 days, then the next part of the injections another week or so. He doesn't want us to slack in any way - or become lazy - or take it lightly. No excuses are accepted. 

Side effects: Yes, there are. I may have menopausal symptom. Every women is different. So can't say for sure. As for weight gain - it's more of a myth - because women tend to eat a lot during this time due to stress. The hormone levels when the first injection is taken drop really low. But if we control our diet and exercise lightly, it should be ok. There is a list of side effects that he will share with us when he sees us after our blood test results are out end of this month. There will be a consent signing session as well in one of the appointments before the IVF.

Since I am suspected to have tubal hydrosalpinx, he will confirm with my file in Pantai when I did the surgery whether the affected tube was clipped or not. Otherwise, I will have to do that surgery first, before starting IVF. Oh and Chinese herbs are a no no starting now.

He did a scan yday and saw I have one egg, ready to pop anytime. Advised us to have sex everyday for the next 5 to 7 days beginning last night. Who knows, we may just get lucky. If it really does happen, it will be the highlight of this whole journey!

Baby dust to all!

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

The beginning to a last resort - cont.

The journey ahead is full of meds, needles and procedures,
We only can hope & pray the Lord blesses us with a little bundle of joy,
For we have come a long long way and no doubt we have grown stronger,
        Oh Lord, as long as it’s a success & a healthy baby, it don’t matter girl or boy.


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