Friday, September 21, 2012

Fifty Shades Freed

As much I didn't want my Fifty Shades to end, it has :(  I miss the world of Christian Grey! (As pathetic as it may sound!)

What more better way to end an awesome trilogy with romance, marriage and kids! Yeap, you got that right! What started as a Dominant-Submissive relationship, ended up having almost like a fairy tale ending. 

"The book starts by taking you through their honeymoon.  They return home to more intrigue with Jack and she finally brings everything to an end with him with Mia’s kidnapping. The story-line’s with Mrs. Robinson, Leila and Suzanne (a new sub that was never mentioned in the other two books) were also tied up. We faced Christian’s fears with him and Anastasia’s insecurities. There are some wonderfully romantic scenes and, as usual, the sex was hot." - Excerpt from here

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Rava Dhosa / Thosa

Yes, I attempted to make Rava Thosa. Hubby really loved it, although it was my very first attempt. I got the idea of the recipe from here. And as usual, I didn't follow through with the recipe. Since I was just trying, I didn't want to make many. Just 2 each would be okay. So I used a small teacup as my measurement. It made 4 thosas. Here's my version of the recipe:
  • 1/2 cup fine semolina (fine Sooji)
  • 1/4 cup rice flour - I bought Baba's brand
  • 1/4 cup whole wheat flour (Aata flour)
  • 1/2 teaspoon cumin seeds (jeera)
  • A pinch of salt - adjust to taste
  • Approx. 2 cups of water
Yes, I didn't add any coriander or chillies. The way to do it is exactly as how it is in the video. This is how mine turned out: 
We had it with some no oil masala sardine :)  This was upon request as hubby was really in the mood for some sardine. 

No more having our weekend thosa in the restaurant anymore!

Friday, September 14, 2012

Just Me, The Mrs

"When you stand and share your story in an empowering way, your story will heal you and your story will heal somebody else."  —  Iyanla Vanzant

Thank you all for being there, for taking the time to read my blog - even though some of you are silent readers :) I want you to know, I appreciate the support.

I hope that in some ways, no matter how small it may be, my blog helps anyone out there who is going through similar moments in his/her life. Whether it's the trying to conceive journey, the love, the marriage, the friendship, the family, the fitness, the health, the movies, the books, the travel & the cooking too! 

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Near Perfect Relationship minus Sex, Intimacy, Caress & Touch = Marriage

I think the subject is self-explanatory. To those of you who don't have to minus the sex, intimacy, caress and touch, please don't bother reading this post. No, I am serious - please stop right now. Also to those who are narrow minded and don't have an open mind to things like these, you too, can close this window. 

This is my personal rant. My personal vent out. I am in one of those low moods. So excuse my language, my bluntness, my words and my thoughts. Heck, wait a minute, it's my blog, my thoughts, my words -so, fuck off if you have a problem.

Remember this post? This issue has been lingering with me since then. Yes, there was another thing I didn't mention, which I am going to write about now.

It's been years, yes, years, the last that I ever felt a caress, some passion (even it was just sexual), made love, and had that kind of intimacy. The benefits of being anonymous eh? I can just blurt it all out. Years went on, I got used to it. Eventually I accepted it. But then it's been in my head. Lingering. Yes, I moved on, but you know how some things just stick? I lost some weight, well, 10kgs to be precise, and yes, my face isn't as round anymore, my skirts are loose, my blouses too... but yet, my better half doesn't find me attractive enough. I get a lot of attention from the outside, but I ain't that kinda woman who would go for it cuz I don't get some at home. Yes, I even am aware there are gigolos out there - yeap, right here in KL. Yes, I know this very well because I used to be friends with one during my single days. But I don't want any of that... I want my husband to 'love' me. Period.

I mean, we had our wild lives before we got hooked up with each other. And yes,  before marriage it was all great. So what happened? I can understand if passion dies off over years and especially when you have kids - but what about when there was none from the beginning of the marriage? The first two years was rough, so leave that aside - but then everything started to fall in place except for this. 

This is the main reason why I begun to have low self esteem. C'mon, my husband doesn't make me feel that I am good enough for him in that way - how do you expect me to have self confidence about my body? Yes, I've done everything. Trust me. You name it, I've tried. Nothing worked. Even spoke to the doctor about this. So the question is, is it really that important to a relationshiop, a marriage? My honest answer? YES. Duh! But would I trade what I have now with him, our bond, just for sex? Nope. I wouldn't. But of course I'd wish he treated me more like a wife, a woman. 

I did a research on the internet. I am not the only wife who is facing this. It's amazing to note that there are tons of them out there. It just ain't right at all. My husband is trying I guess to improve. He started on kissing. But it's just been stuck at that for quite a while. I might as well don't have any hope. It's hurting. And yes, we are trying to conceive too! Hahah That's like a chore. No big deal. It's timed too! Bleah. Maybe it's good we ain't pregnant yet. Cuz with the hormonal changes, the weight, I may just end up doing something stupid being super depressed about it. Low self-esteem can kill. Slowly, but surely. Just like cigerrates, no?

Yes, today is my low day. I thought that I may wanna put this up as private. But heck, why should I? There are thousands of women who go through this, most don't speak up. Hey woman, you aren't alone. Email me if you wanna share your story.

I shall publish this, have a glass of Kahlua - neat, and sleep. Tomorrow is a new day  :)
And soon I shall get hold of this book: Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl - A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship. It may just help to bring back my self-esteem on my own, without depending on my husband for it.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Steamed Fish & Spinach

Yesterday night I made this super easy steamed fish on a bed of no oil stir fry spinach with poached egg whites.

Here's what I did:

Marinate the fish (I used tenggiri) with grated ginger and oyster sauce. Place the fish pieces on a steamer rack and steam it. I used a wok with water, and placed the steamer rack on top and covered. 3 to 5 minutes later, just turn the fish pieces over. And about 5 minutes later, the fish is done.

As for the spinach, finely chop 1 onion, keep aside. Wash the spinach (I used 2 bunches) with salt preferably, then chop it up about an inch apart. Also, finely chop 2 green chillies. Put the onions & chillies first on a non stick, then sprinkle a tea spoon of cumin seeds, then add the spinach on top. Stir occasionally till it's done. Add salt to taste. The spinach takes hardly 10 min to cook.

To serve, place the spinach as the "bed", then the poached egg whites (which are optional), followed by the steamed fish. Garnish with spring onions.


Monday, September 10, 2012

Fifty Shades Darker

Yes, I have completed the second book. It has the same effect as the first - addictive! 

Ms Steele breaks up with Mr C Grey at the end of the first book. And in the second, the author brings in a little more of a love story.

It is obvious they can't get off each other. But then Ana learns all the more about Christian's dark side. Some information she can't digest at all. It's just all too much. Christian on the other hand, learns something new about himself. He doesn't know how to accept and deal with it.

Then comes the part an ex-submissive who confronted Ana. In all the ups and down, the burning desire for each other is too much to bear. But is it all just pure lust, the excitement of kinky fuckery?

Decisions have to be made. How does Ana move on in life - with or without Christian? What kind of sacrifices are they both willing to make to make the then Dominant & Submissive relationship into a real relationship work?

A new plot to the story at the end - someone is trying to lay Christian to rest, for good.

I can't wait to start on my 3rd and final book. But I am trying to refrain myself afraid that I may finish it even before the weekend! And then I'd be sad to know there won't be more books as the world of Christian Grey is just so addictive! Sigh!

Friday, September 7, 2012

Fifty Shades of Grey

I got to know about this book through a friend. Finally, I decided heck, why not. 

When I did go to a bookstore, it was out of stock. I thought to myself, wow, the book is so in demand? The weekend after I went again - since I was passing by - and yeap, there it was. Without thinking twice, picked it up, went to the cashier, and walked out with it. That was on last Sunday afternoon. I started to read the book that evening itself and I couldn't put the book down. I had already gone through 260 over pages! Hubby was like - "whoa, you may wanna slow down a little. At the rate you are going, I won't be surprised if you finish it this very night." Okay, he was right. Monday came and although I so wanted to bring the book with me to office, I didn't. I knew I won't be able to put it down again and that would be no good. I finished the book on Wed night.

Fifty Shades of Grey is a 2011 erotic novel by British author E. L. James. Set largely in Seattle, it is the first installment in a trilogy that traces the deepening relationship between a college graduate, Anastasia Steele, and a young business magnate, Christian Grey. - Wikipedia

If you are into romance, erotic fiction, don't mind reading details on bondage and discipline (BDSM), not offended with the detailed exploration on sex, then it's your loss if you don't read this! I do not know why some say it's a parasitic fan fiction based on the recent Twilight vampire series. Maybe you may see a similarity but I have never watched Twilight, so I can't comment and compare.

I am never a person who collects books. Yes, I love to read, but I am not a collector. I have this principle, or rather, this habit, if something isn't used for 3 months, it's out of the home. BUT, Fifty Shades trilogy will be my first set of books to start on my collection! Yes, you read that right - it's a series of 3 books in total. I am on my second one now.

This is not your ordinary romance fiction. This will blow you away in ways you never imagine. And it's addictive. 

No, seriously, I mean it - addictive!

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Hubby reached his goal in 4 months!

In April 2012, hubby was weighing at 98kg. On September 1st 2012, he reached his goal of 70kg! In 4 months, he lost a total of 28kgs!

Now hold on to your horses! He didn't starve himself. If you read this post, you would know that no meals are skipped. He was of course very determined, disciplined and committed to his routine - meals & exercise/workouts. During this time, he concentrated on cardio.

Now that he has reached his goal, he has now begun to eat normal (still healthy) on alternate days. Those are the days he does weights. On days he eats lesser, he does workout for the core. Cardio is everyday, but lesser intensity.

I started to call him skinny bone because I could see his pelvic bones popping out, his ribs were clearly visible etc etc. He had a reason for this. Now when he puts on weight, it will be the muscle weight. Not putting on on the existing body fat.

The weird thing is, why does everyone think if you lose weight you are sick? Everyone who meets him asks him "Are you sick?". Now that I am losing some weight, I am getting that too. Not as often as mine is not that visible. But still. The next someone asks me, I am going to reply "Why? If I was fatter I am healthy?". What is with people and their perception?

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Weight loss menu plan

Ok, I did mention I will share hubby's weight loss program and menu plan for that one week that I tried. And yes, it works! Yes, you read that right - it works and it is a successful plan that doesn't cost a single penny.

Beginning of the year, my weight was 76kg. Then on August 6th, I was 68.3kg, the beginning of my Day 1 for this plan. At the end of it, I was 66.4kg - a total loss of 1.9kg in 7 days.

Here goes:

Day 1 Monday
Weight: 68.3kg
Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 mug of coffee
Lunch: Vegetables
Evening: Tea
Treadmill: 100 calories
Dinner: Fruits (Avoid bananas, mango)

Day 2 Tuesday
Weight: 68.1kg
Breakfast: Protein shake (Herbalife) 
Lunch: 2 green apples. Granny Smith apples are the best
Evening: Oats
Treadmill: 200 calories
Dinner: Brocolli & yoghurt dip

Day 3 Wednesday
Weight: 67.3kg
Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 mug of coffee
Lunch: Protein shake (Herbalife)
Evening: 2 dates (kurma)
Treadmill: 100 calories
Dinner: Pork tenderloin

Day 4 Thursday
Weight: 67.3kg
Breakfast: 2 Thosai
Lunch: 1 apple
Evening:  - 
Treadmill: 130 calories
Dinner: Lentils & Spinach

Day 5 Friday
Weight: 67.5kg
Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 mug of coffee
Lunch: Lentils & Spinach (leftover)
Evening:  - 
Treadmill: 130 calories
Dinner: Some pan fried no batter nuggets

Day 6 Saturday
Weight: 66.8kg

Day 7 Sunday
Weight: 66.4kg

Water is your best friend throughout. Sometimes we think we are hungry, but in actual fact, we are thirsty. We had Herbalife lying in the kitchen cabinet for a while. So just wanted to finish it. If you don't have it, you can substitute it with eggs etc. I was suppose to have a egg sandwhich on Day 4, but I had 2 Thosai instead. Haha Well, yes, I altered the menu plan he did for me a tiny wee bit! This includes the treadmill sessions too - he was lenient and the min I should do is up to 100 calories. On days I was in the mood, I'd just walk longer.

As of this morning, I am 65.1kg. Yes, I am delighted! I am sure I could have lost more if for the past few days I did some walking at least on the treadmill. But due to my menstrual cycle, it has been put on hold. For you ladies out there, don't despair if before your period, your weight goes up by a kg or two. 4 days ago mine was 67 plus... But I knew, it was because of my period. I didn't bother checking my weight until this morning.

Good luck to whoever who wants to try the above! And to those who think they can't do it - yes you can. Cuz we could! Trust me, we love to eat! But now we love our health more than anything. And I for one, definitely need to lose weight if we are going to take the plunge. (Hopefully we wouldn't have to eh?).

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Debt free from the magical & most evil cards!

Whether you care to know or not, credit card debt is the worst debt to have.
A very experienced finance person spoke to us and explained, that it's better to have no savings now and clear your credit card debt, then try to pay a small amount to credit cards and also keep aside for savings. We used to do the latter. Yes, no doubt debts like car loans can't be settled instantly but credit card debt is the worst debt to have, he explained. We took his advice, and sold our unit trusts & some gold and took out whatever little savings we had (since we had used up almost all in building our home) and started to clear whatever we could on the cards. We also started to dump almost RM2500 a month on the cards.

When you are young & irresponsible and you think having a credit card is a cool 'in' thing, you are surely in for a lesson of your life! Unless of course you are a spoil brat!

I owned my first credit card at the age of 21. Yes, it was cool and awesome to own a Citibank credit card. But when the bills kept coming and the amount kept hiking, I was in for trouble. I was working and studying at the same time and I definitely couldn't pay my debts. The bank started to call me asking for payment, and I kept paying the minimum amount, not knowing that it didn't make a difference due to the interest and late payment charges. I owe it to my parents for helping me settle my debt. Yes, I was ashamed. Told myself never again.

But that never again didn't last too long. After I got married, our credit card debt started to accumulate again. Spending on home stuff, renovations, buying stuff we didn't need and things that could have waited for the cash to come in, and then the never ending doctor's appointments, medical tests etc etc the list just goes on and on.

I used to have 2 credit cards, one from Maybank and another from HSBC. Both of which were basic cards. We cleared my Maybank credit card which was totaling to more than RM15,000 and I chose to cancel the card. Boy oh boy did the bank kept pestering me to retain my card. They even told me they will upgrade my card and give me a larger amount of credit just for me to retain. No, I wasn't flattered at all. I made it clear that I want to cancel my card and not wanting to take up their offer. You see, we learnt the hard way about having credit cards. 

Oh by the way, I stopped carrying my credit card with me now and I feel more in power of my daily/monthly expenses. I am keeping my HSBC for traveling purposes. Hubby on the other hand, doesn't use his Amex any longer, and he has his Platinum card with him all the time. But never used now for any of our "wants". By next month, we will be totally credit card debt free. It feels GREAT.

Imagine paying every month a total of RM2000 to credit cards, when you can actually be saving that every month and at the end of 10 months, you would have RM20,000!!! Duh!

Monday, September 3, 2012

The point is - I can walk!

For the first time in many years, I can walk during my menstruation cycle - Day 1 and 2.
Yes, no joke. For most women out there, monthly menstruation is just a discomfort, but to some like me, we suffer! (even the word suffer seems understated).

Before this cycle, I went for a point to point pressure massage. It all started when I went for a foot reflexology and this guy, Allan, told me I am having some "issues" with my lower abdomen organs. I of course, didn't say anything. I just said "Yeah meh?" He continued to explain to me - and to be honest, he was spot on. But you see, whenever I do a foot massage, I refrain from telling them my aches and pains, because I feel they will use that to tell you "Yes, you have this problem, that problem etc etc".

But this time, something told me to discuss with hubby and see if he too agrees for me to do this massage that was recommended by Allan. It's an hour long massage and it starts from the back, and eventually ends at the stomach. It's not painful. The only pain I encountered was my lower pelvic area - which is the culprit for my horrible monthly pain to the point I only can curl in bed.

It seems, my stomach area is "cold" and full of "wind". I am not sure if this makes sense.

Anyway, the second thing I am doing different is, I have been drinking coffee. I am generally not a coffee drinker. But this time, I decided, since coffee is heaty, and a bestie mentioned that coffee does work for her to ease her cramps, I decided, heck why not? Of course I have to counter this with tons of water, extra then my normal intake, more Ural's - just to avoid a UTI attack.

My best friends for these periods are 500mg Ponstans, Panadols & gastric medicines.

I am not sure if the massage worked, or the coffee, or both - but this is my first menstrual cycle in many many years that I am able to walk. Yes, I have pain, but I can stand it. I feel like a hand is inside my right pelvic area and pulling, kneading, stretching the hell out of it and it's like the hand is salted and the inside are all cuts and bruises. Try putting salt on a wound! BUT I can walk. Slowly, but I can - that's the point.

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Cabin in the Woods


Directed by: Drew Goddard
Starring: Kristen Connelly, Chris Hemsworth (yes, its Thor) and a few others
Running time: 95 minutes

I have 2 words for this movie: Twisted & Wicked!

It starts out kinda slow and mellow, 5 teenagers taking a weekend trip to some remote cabin in the woods. Out comes the usual ‘I-dare-you’ reckless teenage fun. This is when the movie gets into gear. The teenage brigade becomes the subject of a dead zombie family’s hunting game! One by one gets attacked, viciously killed until the remaining 2. Little did they know, that this place they’re in – is some sort of an elaborate experiment where all the horrors are controlled and manipulated by a group of technicians.

The last 2, Dana and Marty, escape from this big zombie dude by the dock and stumble into the grave where the zombies came from, which leads them to an underground elevator. This is the craziest part of the whole movie! Say hello to almost every sick scary demented creature of horror that has appeared in our imaginations (and nightmares)! This happens to be where the technicians control centre is; making perfect sense for housing these scary monsters (won’t tell you what kind, cos that will spoil the fun!).

Dana and Marty finally find themselves at a bottom level of the facility, where they meet the “Director”. The Director explains briefly that they are part of a ritual where all 5 teenagers must be ‘sacrificed’ and their blood provided as an offering to the “Ancient Ones” who live beneath. Failure to do so will awake them from their slumber and they will terrorize the world that we live in. Any guesses what happens next?

What a sick crazy monster infestation of a movie madness!

Acting / Performance: 5.5
Plot / Story: 7
Music / Score: 6
(Special) Horror / Monster Madness: 8
In a single number: 7

 Movie Review by Just Me, The Mr


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